Beautiful post, Lore. I had the privilege of sharing a meal with Rich Mullins shortly before his passing circa Summer of '97. I was just a kid at the time but recall Rich as being a very kind person.
I LOVE this post as it is such a salient theme in all families. In the end we must choose to realize that the way we remember—voicing that—can cause unity or division in the family. First-born, middle, and last-born all remember through different perspectives. I have seen this in my own family. This is where a lot of drama lives. Letting go is a form of humility and forgiveness. So insightful and personal, I truly enjoyed reading this.
Was so excited to see you on the Holy Post!!! My housemate is now also convinced we need your book!
This piece really resonates with me as I am learning to work through the past and not carry trauma forward. In the midst of my pain I had lost sight of the positive memories I carried. Someone has recently come into my life, who asks me questions that help me remember the good things that happened that had been swallowed by the pain.
To me, this stems from living in mortal, faulty bodies within this fallen world. Our eyes will be fully opened once we’re in eternity with The Truth—Jesus Christ.
Have you read The End of Memory by Miroslav Volf? The one aspect I really appreciated in his work was the idea that not every evil has to be "redeemed" by our story and woven into this grand positive, "growing" narrative, which it feels to me sometimes leads Christians down a path of just gaslighting others or even themselves? But that some evils will just be declared evil and driven out when Christ renews all things.
This also reminds me of the Truth & Reconciliation Commission in South Africa... there it was collective trauma as well as individual truama, and trying to write a cohesive history for the country that included these traumas... trying to get all the "siblings" to listen to each others truth. There has been so much written about the intersection of truth, memory, and justice at that time. Some people here are still quite upset about the justice aspect -- they spilled their truth in public and feel no justice happened-- like, if we can all agree this is true, and it *did* happen, what do we do about it? I think Tutu felt that healing was more important than legal punishment when dealing with such convoluted circles of victims and perpetrators, and that just hearing each others truth could be healing... and maybe in many ways, for participants it was? But the next generation feels like "nothing happened!" And the collective memory of both grandchildren of victims and perpetrators gets more black and white and less grey.
This resonates so much. I’ve dealt with a lot of childhood trauma and I often wonder why my reality feels so different from my siblings. I tell the truth in the most honest way I can. I wonder what story have they needed to survive, or if their experience really was so very different. Mostly I just keep praying that God would reveal the truth, even if it means I’m wrong. I think (and hope) that if our desire really is for the truth, we will find more and more of it, even when it’s painful.
Beautiful post, Lore. I had the privilege of sharing a meal with Rich Mullins shortly before his passing circa Summer of '97. I was just a kid at the time but recall Rich as being a very kind person.
I LOVE this post as it is such a salient theme in all families. In the end we must choose to realize that the way we remember—voicing that—can cause unity or division in the family. First-born, middle, and last-born all remember through different perspectives. I have seen this in my own family. This is where a lot of drama lives. Letting go is a form of humility and forgiveness. So insightful and personal, I truly enjoyed reading this.
Was so excited to see you on the Holy Post!!! My housemate is now also convinced we need your book!
This piece really resonates with me as I am learning to work through the past and not carry trauma forward. In the midst of my pain I had lost sight of the positive memories I carried. Someone has recently come into my life, who asks me questions that help me remember the good things that happened that had been swallowed by the pain.
To me, this stems from living in mortal, faulty bodies within this fallen world. Our eyes will be fully opened once we’re in eternity with The Truth—Jesus Christ.
Love this! Especially "We're still reading the future through the past . . . "
Have you read The End of Memory by Miroslav Volf? The one aspect I really appreciated in his work was the idea that not every evil has to be "redeemed" by our story and woven into this grand positive, "growing" narrative, which it feels to me sometimes leads Christians down a path of just gaslighting others or even themselves? But that some evils will just be declared evil and driven out when Christ renews all things.
This also reminds me of the Truth & Reconciliation Commission in South Africa... there it was collective trauma as well as individual truama, and trying to write a cohesive history for the country that included these traumas... trying to get all the "siblings" to listen to each others truth. There has been so much written about the intersection of truth, memory, and justice at that time. Some people here are still quite upset about the justice aspect -- they spilled their truth in public and feel no justice happened-- like, if we can all agree this is true, and it *did* happen, what do we do about it? I think Tutu felt that healing was more important than legal punishment when dealing with such convoluted circles of victims and perpetrators, and that just hearing each others truth could be healing... and maybe in many ways, for participants it was? But the next generation feels like "nothing happened!" And the collective memory of both grandchildren of victims and perpetrators gets more black and white and less grey.
This resonates so much. I’ve dealt with a lot of childhood trauma and I often wonder why my reality feels so different from my siblings. I tell the truth in the most honest way I can. I wonder what story have they needed to survive, or if their experience really was so very different. Mostly I just keep praying that God would reveal the truth, even if it means I’m wrong. I think (and hope) that if our desire really is for the truth, we will find more and more of it, even when it’s painful.
This juxtaposes nicely with what I’ve read so far in John Mark Comer’s Live No Lies. :)
Oh man! Haven't read it yet but glad to hear that!