I'm Obsessed with You and It's Making Me Sicker

A measles outbreak, a corrupt and crooked billionaire president, a generation of estranged families, fast fashion, and #booktok

My city has a lead problem. We heard about it through the grapevine when we first moved in, city council giving our neighbors water filtration systems to deal with the old pipes and questionable water.

We had ours checked out. “You’re good,” they said.

Still, I rarely drink our tap water, choosing instead to drink almost exclusively from the stainless steel water filter next to our sink.

I saw the filter on Instagram in 2019, on the counters of granola trad-wives and van-life YouTubers, in the houses of my friends who care about holistic health and doing what we can since there’s so much we can’t. I’m not obsessed with alternative healthcare or simple living or even Instagram, but there was something in the water—no pun intended—and it seemed like that many people couldn’t be wrong about drinking it safe and filtered.

Bonus, it tastes better.

This is how we ended up with a measles outbreak, a corrupt and crooked billionaire for president, a generation of estranged families, fast fashion, and #booktok.

My body has been hurting lately and I’m trying to figure out why. My For You Page [FYP] on Instagram says it’s because I have Ehlers-Danlos syndrome, a genetic disorder that causes hyper-mobility and joint soreness. It also tells me I’m probably not getting enough protein or drinking enough water. Another influencer tells me that people are eating too much protein and not prioritizing fiber. But I have diverticulosis and I smash fiber goals like it’s my full time job.

Thank God for the podcaster I love because how else would I have known about the tasteless, odorless, completely blendable fiber powder that doesn’t make me choke every morning? Also, thanks to the same podcaster for her sponsor who pointed me in the way of the probiotic I’ve taken for years. I hope she’s still getting kickbacks from my monthly purchases.

Kickbacks, there’s something we could talk about. Or not. Let’s stay on task:

Another Instagram influencer tells me my legs are painful to the touch because I have lipedema, another one says it’s because I need to do inner-child healing, a therapist-fluencer says I need somatic therapy and pastor-fluencer says it’s unforgiveness stuck in my body. A body-pos one says to embrace the thighs, dress for the female gaze—my own, preferably.

I’ve been thinking about the power of peer pressure, something most of us believe we’re past, having left it in the way of middle school. I haven’t though. I swim in its waters. You probably do too. It’s definitely filtered.